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I've been running TTRPG's since I got a classic DND box in the early 1990's. At the time I was the only one of my friends who had any DND stuff, and even after my friends started getting their own things, they would eventually give or sell their stuff to me as they only wanted to play and not run.

About 8-9 years ago I got back into playing. I tried 5E at my FLGS, but I felt I wasn't invested in the party and always just waiting for my turn (This could be because 5E feels like a slog to me, but who knows?)

I rarely act as a player in games, and have only "played" in a few in recent memory, but I feel like I'm comfortable as a Forever GM. I know I'm ADHD, but I feel like because I have to be "on" and focusing all my attention to all facets of the game, it works because I never have a down moment and am always interacting with some element of the game.

Ok so I'm posting this to vent a bit because I'm feeling down and tired and honestly I don't know how to process this otherwise. I'm also interested in sharing my feelings with other people (specially other GMs around here) and have a conversation about this because it's also kind of a lonely hill to be at rn.

The issue:

As of late I've been feeling very negatively against the general selfish attitude of players and play groups I come across in this hobby. My dissatisfaction with the hobby because of this has been growing to the point of making me just tired and uncomfortable with the very idea of keeping running RPGs. I just don't like how other people/players treat me. It's not even an issue with my current group,. but more of a general behavior most RPG players I interact with engage on.

I've been primarily a GM since I started playing RPGs (more than a decade ago) and I've given my best at every single step of the way, and I've been "successful" at that, in the sense of almost always receiving "praise" on how I GM and how good my games are etc etc. But I've been feeling that "positive feedback" on my GM "performance" is absolutely not enough for me to justify all the effort that I put into it.

What I mean is (Tl;Dr): my players always tell me that THEY are having fun, but am I having fun myself?

When I sit down to play a game (any game not just RPGs) I do it because I like the game itself, or the experience of playing the game. I engage with its systems, I read about it online and theorycraft strategies to play it, etc. I might even try to master it or get good at it if it is a game I particularly enjoy mechanically, or maybe geek out about its narrative/story with other people if it moved me, etc.

The problem specifically with TTRPGs and GMing/Running them is that I'm usually not really engaging with the game in any meaningful way that I enjoy but rather I'm always being pushed into "entertaining" the players instead. Y'know, do the funny voices, teach the rules, do all of the world-building, provide a challenge, provide satisfying narrative elements according to the premise of the game, etc. Meanwhile most players will rarely roleplay their characters, won't learn the rules, won't engage in any meaningful worldbuilding, won't do anything to facilitate a satisfying narrative and will ignore the very premise of the game repeatedly. Instead of a "facilitator" of play, I feel trapped as an "engine" of play and just in a very dehumanized and lonely spot.

Years ago I stopped running D&D 5e specifically because it was mostly a lot of work for me and no fun. But my attempts at trying other games with different people almost always end up boiling down to the same "D&D 5e-ish" behaviour of players just being kinda selfish and pushing the responsibility of the game being "good" or "entertaining" on ME alone. And I'm just kinda... tired.

Even with games that are specifically designed to be collaborative, like most PbtA games or games that REQUIRE collaborative world building per the rules like Fabula Ultima, I find that players always offload a lot of the work to me as the GM or facilitator.

Because of this I've become trapped in a loop of trying new games, having a terrible experience trying to play them because players choosing to rely on me instead of engaging with the game rules/procedures/premises, then burning out and defaulting to playing the same old D&D clones and modules again and again because at least that's just easy for me to run. And I feel like I've completely lost my interest in the hobby at this point.

I even asked my current group what RPGs are THEY interested in playing and their unanimous answer was "whatever you would like to run". This SOUNDS good but always translates to "whatever you would like to run as long as I don't need to learn anything or engage with the game at all and you do everything in your power to entertain me instead".

Imagine asking your friend group if they would like to play Magic the Gathering, they accepting and then having YOU build their decks, track their life totals and tell them what cards to play each turn while you do funny SFX a la Arena after each play, and then telling you they had a lot of fun. (!!).

I'm glad my friends had a lot of fun, but as long as I'm not having fun myself what even am I doing?

It's a lot of stress and a lot of effort to run TTRPGs, and I think it's not a lot to ask to have players stop thinking in their own fun for a second and instead start paying attention to how other people are doing, specially their GM. Literally no one ever asks my opinion on the game we are playing or if I'm having fun at all. Instead I feel like running RPGs is taken like if it's some kind of career or job, while also not being paid at all for doing it.

To clarify a bit, I feel it's (probably) not a me problem either because I've recently been playing solo RPGs a lot and I've had A LOT of fun at that. I enjoy not just the freedom of solo play, but also how I'm not being asked to entertain anybody else and I can just focus on engaging with the game itself.

Anyways. Tl;Dr again is: my players always tell me that THEY are having fun, but am I having fun myself? Most of the time I'm just not.

So I found that the more universally applicable and the more simulationist the system is — the harder it is to make it really excel at anything other than those 2. So lately I've beel more on the lookout for a very specific systems doing their thing the best way possible.

• While PF2E / SF2E is generally praised for it's combat it pales in comparison with something like LANCER, which has multiple specific gamemodes and systems that fully work only in tandem with each other and with the intended setting (mechas are fine, but NHPs cascading, paracausal tech and eidolons aren't that universal)

• Legend in the Mist has a really fluid and intuitive character building process with great advancements system pushing the narrative forwards, but it has basically no tactical combat.

• Unknown Armies 3e has really cool magic systems that are overly specific.

• Ars Magica has a set multi-pc-per-player long lasting campaigns (multiple pc generations) where turns may last months full of politics and inventing custom spells.

• Blades in the Dark is really good at making cinematic all-planned heists with little friction and managing a band, but not much more.

• OSR games are usually really good at combat-as-war, attrition systems and resource management.

So what are your favorite systems for their overly specific thing that they excel at? Maybe it has a really specific power system tied to a setting, maybe the setting itself is that good and unique, maybe it is really a civilization game in disguise, or it is great for playing over text messages, or it is a vtt/videogame exclusive with no table option.

I was thinking about the upcoming 5.5e World of Warcraft book coming out later this year (which, despite myself, I'm hype for), and how WoW has had around 2 and a half adaptations into TTRPG form so far.

That got me to thinking about other major fantasy or non-fantasy franchises that have gotten adaptations. Including Bethesda's own Fallout, which has an official Mophidius adaptation.

Yet, somehow, through it's 30 year history as a franchise; The Elder Scrolls has never gotten one official TTRPG release. Not a full bespoke system, and not even a d20 adaptation. Just...nothing. Only some fan games and adaptations over the years.

There isn't really a greater point here honestly. It's just kind of mind boggling that a game franchise with such deep ties to TTRPGs in its origin/systems, with a world that seems tailormade for a TTRPG adaptation, just never got one. You'd think there'd have been at least ONE at SOME point, you know?

Anyway, I guess for discussions sake, any ideas on why that is? Any other "seemingly obvious" franchises that somehow haven't gotten an adaptation into TTRPG form?

I'm certain there's been other people echoing this sentiment in the past but, here goes anyway.

I've been very much so wanting to get into the hobby recently. I have experienced being a player in the past but only once a month for maybe six months, many years ago and it was an absolutely horrible experience that I don't want to talk about tbh.

The problem seems to be finding a group with a GM. So I thought, why not become one! The realization of everything that entailed sunk in pretty quickly. But I'm not scared of the world building, putting on silly character voices, designing side stories for the players in my group etc.

I'm scared of failing. I'm scared of disappointing people. I'm scared of not living up to individual expectations, taking too long to think of a situational response, not coming up with clean improv, just.. failing at the things that makes a great GM, great.

So I guess my question is, how did you guys get your start? How did your first session go? How did you realize the areas in which you were lacking so that you even knew to improve them?

I would ESPECIALLY be interested in hearing from a worst case scenario GM. Someone who was horrible, or at the very least had a horrible first experience, and then hear about how you rebounded from that, what did you do next?

If you guys know anyone like this I would be ecstatic if you could have them reply to the thread because I really need the encouragement, especially since I'm the not so outgoing one of the friend groups I've been part of through the years. Guess that's another facet to this, wanting to put myself out there a little more. Maybe even make some friends!

As the title suggests, I’m looking for a decent game system to run a campaign that takes place in the Halo universe. I’ve seen some systems that don’t seem to have a whole lot of experienced players/gm’s sharing their thoughts on the game itself. I’d love to see what y’all suggest!

I'm talking about a game that's evocative, whether through the mechanics or the worldbuilding, but it's either too much on a GM/Player or it doesn't interest your group.

For me, it's Continuum - roleplaying in The Yet. Just a fascinating look at what a society of time travelers would look like, but I doubt I could wrap my head around GMing it.

Forests, Mountains and Swamps are the most common locations in most TTRPGs. But let's shake things up a little and add some twist.

So we've put together a small table of intriguing locations that might stand in the Scouts' way. Almost all of them are based on real places.

https://imgur.com/kCbrkgT

You can use them outside DREICH too, and since there are 20 of them, they fit a d20 perfectly.

In DREICH, one of the main goals is to explore and push deeper into the unknown continent, so we prepared this table.

My friend and I are organizing a modern-day RPG campaign involving weapons. The party is supposed to be an elite military team. The problem we encountered was the system because all the games we know have magic or supernatural elements at their core. I know of some that don't, but the focus is on investigation, and there's no combat system. Does anyone know of a game that balances both aspects? It's fine to have an investigative focus, but there needs to be a good combat system.

I'm looking for any examples of games that are similar to the PbtA or FitD family, but with more granular progression. By that, I mean instead of just having a stat that goes from 0 to 4, there's a wider range of values and/or more factors (such as gear) that contribute to your odds of success.

Besides granular progression, I'd love it if the game also has player-facing rolls, non-binary resolution, and/or other features that support a high-improv play/GM style (as opposed to high-prep).